This is the final "Calling of a Woman" posts done by Rebecca at Rebecca's Reflections. These post have been so encouraging to me, and she has said exactly what I wanted to say, but I have to say she says it so much better than I could have! My thoughts run ahead of my typing...which I noticed after I emailed a friend yesterday! :D Thanks again, Rebecca, for allowing me to post these! This is the final part of my series on the calling of a woman. I apologize for the delay in writing this post. It seems that I have had an especially difficult time in putting what I believe into words. I feel such a burden to make everything clear to all of you. I pray that this series of posts has been a help and blessing to you! Even if you have not been in agreement with everything that has been said, I hope that at least you have been challenged to reevaluate what you believe in the light of God's Word.
In Part 1 of this series, my original question was: What is the calling of a woman? More specifically, I asked: Is a woman called to a man or to a ministry (or to another occupation)? If you have been reading my previous posts, you have probably already guessed what my position is concerning the calling of a woman. This issue is something that I have thought about for a long time. I have asked counsel from people and have studied the Word of God to help me to understand a woman's calling. I have come to the conclusion that, if it is God's will for a woman to marry, she is called to her husband.
Before I delve into the reasons for this conviction, I think that it is necessary that I address the woman who is unmarried. Realistically, I understand that not every woman will get married. God, in His sovereignty, sometimes uses an unmarried woman to do a special work which could not be accomplished by a married woman. The Apostle Paul, by the inspiration of God, speaks of this in Scripture: "There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband (I Corinthians 7:34)."
With that being said, allow me to explain why I believe what I do concerning the calling of a woman. I believe that a woman is called to her husband for the following reasons:
- The creation of the woman: she was made for the man.
- The purpose of the woman: she was made to be the help meet for the man.
- The role of the woman: she was commanded to be in submission to the man.
There are many evidences of the nature of the creation of woman and the purpose for which she was created. In a courtship, the man pursues; the woman responds. In a wedding ceremony, the man takes; the woman is given. In a marriage, the man leads; the woman follows. Ultimately, a marriage is a beautiful picture of the relationship between Christ and the Church--the man is a picture of Christ; the woman of the church.
But as I said in Part 1 of this series, there is much confusion today concerning the calling of a woman. I will address two areas of confusion: a woman's calling to a career and a woman's calling to a ministry.
The Calling to a Career
The majority of women today have employment outside the home. Most women work for one of two reasons: either they work to contribute to their family's income or they work because they feel that their job gives them a sense of worth or fulfillment. Apparently, these women feel some sort of calling to their careers--or else they would not be working, right? (I suppose that not all women express their sentiments in these exact words.)
However, I believe that the Word of God shows plainly that a woman's place is in the home. I challenge you to find an example of a woman in the Bible who works outside the home. The Lord's plan has always been for the man to provide for the family and for the woman to care for the home. In fact, such has been the case until very recent times.
If a woman is married, she is called to be a wife. If she has children, she is called to be a mother. What could be more fulfilling than being a wife and mother? How could she possibly find joy in any other pursuit?
The Calling to a Ministry
There are many young women today who say that they are called to be a pastor's wife or a missionary's wife. Some even say that they are called to a specific place of ministry. But can a woman pinpoint a specific area or place of ministry when she has not yet met her husband?
Did God intend for women to first determine their own calling and then find a man who shares the same calling? Suppose a woman does marry a man who shares her "calling". What happens if the man is later called to another location or to a different area of ministry? I surely hope that the woman does not insist on staying because she has been "called" to that particular ministry.
In some instances, the Lord does not lead a man to serve in ministry until after he has already married. I have heard of such stories in which the man's wife protests saying, "Well, the Lord didn't call me!"I contend that the Lord did call her. Whether she realizes it or not, she answered God's call the day she agreed to marry her husband.
I feel a little hesitant about what I am about to say. Biblically, I cannot find evidence of a woman being called to a ministry at all. I believe that the Lord most certainly does call men to serve Him today. I believe that He calls women also--but probably not in the way which is commonly thought. The Lord calls women to serve alongside their husbands--to be the completer and the helper which is suitable to him. If it is God's will that a woman marry, she is first and foremost called to be the wife of her husband.
Some Final Thoughts
I will admit that I have not always believed everything that I have put forth in this post. I am speaking specifically of the issue of a woman's calling to a ministry. When the Lord first began to work in my heart concerning this, I found myself trying to make excuses. But when I finally accepted what I believe is God's plan for women, I felt such a relief! Truly, God's plan for women and the purpose for which she was created is a beautiful thing!
Truthfully, I still hope with all of my heart that the Lord allows me to serve Him alongside my husband someday. But the Lord knows what is best. Whatever my future husband's vocation may be, I will know of a certainty that the Lord has called me to be his wife. Whether the Lord calls my husband to a foreign land or to stay here in America, I will go with him. I will go with him because he will be my husband--I will be his wife.
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2 comments:
A very good series of posts. I have read only the first, third, and fourth. If I missed what I'm about to discuss in the second, please excuse me.
The author wrote, "However, I believe that the Word of God shows plainly that a woman's place is in the home. I challenge you to find an example of a woman in the Bible who works outside the home."
Isn't there a double standard practiced for single women and married women? Among Christians who would agree with the author concerning married women, there are some who will say nothing against a single woman working outside the home prior to her marriage. Does a single woman's experience and working outside the home prepare (or rather unprepare) her for marriage differently than if she had stayed within the home environment? I contend that it does. Is it Biblical for a single, unmarried maiden, who is still under the care and authority of her father, to be engaged in work outside the home (e.g., at the grocery store, or somewhere in the so-called "Christian work environment" or "Christian bubble")? In these arenas, a single maiden is under the oversight and authority of a man OTHER THAN her father, and she is NOT being trained to be a keeper at home as the Bible specifies. I challenge you to find an example of a godly unmarried maiden in the Bible who worked outside the home.
There are examples in the Bible of single women who worked. But they did so out of absolute necessity to provide for themselves after their husband had died (e.g., Ruth, Naomi, widow at Zarephath). There may be others, such as Lydia, who was a seller of purple (a business woman), but she was LOST when Paul met her.
In the third post, the author wrote: A woman's primary focus should be her home and family. Titus 2:5 admonishes the older women to teach the younger women to be "keepers at home." "Keepers at home" is actually just one Greek word which means "one who looks after domestic affairs with prudence and care." Quite frankly, I think that it is a little difficult for a woman to truly be a "keeper at home" while working a job outside the home. Proverbs 31 also makes it very clear that the woman should concentrate her attention on serving in her home.
Wouldn't it be difficult for the older women (i.e., mothers) to teach and train the young women (i.e., single maidens) to do these things in Titus 2 if the single woman is working from 8:00am to 4:30pm five day a week at the local Bible book store, or as the pastor's secretary, or at Walmart? How can she be fully prepared for marriage by leaving the trainer (her mother and perhaps grandmother) and training ground (the home, the house, and domestic arena) for a significant period time of her life? This leads to the question if she should be outside the home for any purpose? The author's discussion centers around "work" outside the home. But does it matter what she's doing (working, volunteering, college education) if she is forgoing the training INSIDE the home with her mother to be a keeper at home?
These are good posts. But there are a few stones left unturned, that should be thought about, studied from the Word, and addressed in additional posts.
Dear Anonymous:
Thank you for your comment. I always love to read what my readers think, but I'm kind of confused...what do you believe? Do you believe a lady's place is in the home entirely or do you believe a lady can work outside of the home until marriage? Then maybe I can answer your questions in a better light...b/c you seem to go from one point working and then staying entirely in the home...
Again, thanks for the comment...
Jennifer
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